A man bought a parrot. It was a beautiful parrot, with bright colorful plumage. Unfortunately, it also had a bad attitude, and fowl language.
So bad, in fact, that it spent its days in misdeeds: Pecking at the man when he was distracted, pooping on the carpet, and squawking obscenities at the girl scouts from the window.
Now, the man really loved parrots, and he was determined to make this work. He tried everything he could to change the bird’s attitude: He sang to it. He tried to reason with it, give it extra affection, take it on walks… But nothing worked. The parrot kept up its diabolical ways.
One night, at the precise moment when the man had finally fallen asleep, the parrot flew over and pecked him on the nose with shrieking, obscenity-laced, birdy invective. Terrified and at the end of his rope, the man sprang out of bed, plucked the parrot out of the air, marched it over to the kitchen, and shoved it in the freezer. He heard the bird’s muffled kicking and cussing. But then… all went quiet. Filled with remorse, the man opened the freezer door: Out flew the parrot, making a beeline for its perch. The man ran over begging the parrot for forgiveness.
The parrot, rustling its feathers and tossing its head, said in perfect, quiet politeness: “No. It is I who must apologize. I am sorry that I offended you with my bad language and cruel actions. I see now how hard life has been for you, and I ask for your forgiveness.”
The man – astounded at the bird’s change in attitude – was about to ask what had suddenly changed him when the parrot continued:
“By the way, may I ask… What did the chicken do?”
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